Give me a pack of condoms. What size? I do not know... Well, take this board with holes, and go to the toilet and measure. In 10 minutes the man comes back: I have changed my mind, I don't need the condoms. How much is this board?condom_joke
A man walked into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asked him what had happened. “Well, it’s like this,” explained the man, “I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.
“Well, we went to look for it, and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something protruding from its rear end. Sure enough, when I lifted its tail, there was my wife’s golf ball.”
“And?” pried the doctor.
“Well, that’s when I made my mistake. I lifted the cow’s tail and yelled to the misses, ‘This one here looks like yours’.”
